A Great Audition

The hardest thing for me — and for many performers — is to conjure up a sense of confidence while feeling vulnerable and needy. Desperation — to be cast ... to have a validation of talent ... to not face rejection yet again — can turn me into a quivering, warbling mess.

I auditioned tonight for Godspell. I want to get in. I think I'm good enough. I want that validation, and I don't want to be rejected. ... But aside from those feelings, which I can never completely dismiss, my audition was about two things: 1) having fun and 2) believing in my talent regardless of the specific outcome.

It was helpful that I was auditioning for a welcoming theatre company, not a cliquey one. And the production team is specifically looking for people who can work well as a group and be free from ego. I also was there with one of my best friends, which helped me have more fun.

They invited people to sing songs from the show other than the specific audition piece at the end of the night. So I sang a song I wanted to sing. I messed it up (because it was my first time singing it other than with the CD and the counting was tough), but I didn't stress out about it. And then I blew the roof off with the high A that ends the song!

Remember that high G that I used to be worried about? This is a full step higher. And I hit it in full, strong voice with no problem. My voice lessons have paid off. (And my voice teacher says I regularly sing to a C or C# and vocalize to an F above high C. So G's and A's should be nothing to worry about.)

I'll find out Friday or Saturday whether I got in. I'm crossing my fingers. And I hope that this audition sets the stage for a great audition for Annie on Saturday.