Where is the Universe Pushing Me?

I've been unemployed (and searching for a job) for 10 months. And I've realized why this is so depressing and frustrating to me.

I never realized looking for a job (any job) would be this fraught with rejection. That was theoretically why I initially chose not to pursue an acting career — it's so hard to find work! But if I'm going to be rejected, if I'm going to be unemployed, if I'm going to be stressing and working hard to find something ... why am I not going through all those things in order to find the job I want, the job I'll love? Why am I going through all that to find a job I don't really want anyway?

Maybe the universe is trying to give me a kick in the pants and push me where I need to go.

Sometimes I think that and brush it off. Sometimes there's just such a thing as crappy luck and there's no cosmic plan involved. Other times I'll feel reassured because it makes so much sense. That's why I haven't been able to find another day job in Vermont! I'm not supposed to have another day job in Vermont; I'm supposed to pursue an acting career (which means moving where the work is).

Well, I'll think on it.