The people who really want it

I've always had a great deal of resentment for people who casually walk into auditions and get cast, the people who don't stress over getting a role because they don't care that much, the people who get so many leads that a chorus role is like a rejection. Basically, the people who don't appreciate what they have.

There's a part of me that's mystified by people who don't want to act — or by people who do want to act but don't want to do it all the time. (My husband, for example, is a good actor and enjoys acting but is more than happy to take several months off after doing a show.)

So it felt great to talk to Alex (21-year-old daughter of the producer, and herself co-producer, co-director and co-choreographer of Urinetown). Here, finally, was someone else who feels the same way I do, someone who has had similar experiences of lots of rejection. She gets it! We talked about how we'd be happy doing regional theatre and summer stock. We talked about how if we could just be gypsies for the rest of our lives, we'd be thrilled. Sure leads and Broadway are the ideal, and we wouldn't say no. But we love it enough and want it enough to happily settle for "less." That's what love is.

And in a way, we have something that other performers lack: joy and gratitude. Rejection is still hard. I'll never like rejection, even though I can understand the way that it's "good." It means that when we do get cast, we appreciate it that much more. And because we love what we do so much, we experience a joy that other people don't.